Those Yapping Dogs

Barking dogs are one of this columnist's pet peeves.

“I’m gonna shoot those dogs one day,” I announce to my wife as the digital clock flashes 6:30 — on a Saturday morning.  

You see, the problem is that I have a neighbor who is basically in a coma all of the time. She is three houses down and is totally oblivious to the constant baying of her hounds in her back yard. Maybe baying is not the right word. The better word is yelping. They are small, pesky dogs (I don’t know what kind), and they are constantly screeching right into my bedroom window.

I just don’t get it. I’ve got a dog, a standard poodle named Paris. We did spend some money to get her trained and maybe my neighbor couldn’t afford to do the same, but I doubt it. But even if your dog has not been trained, don’t you hear the darn things making NOISE in your back yard? Are you totally obvious to the fact that your little poochies are barking their buns off?

Of course, the noise is even more noticeable on the weekend when we try to sleep in a little.  We’re early risers during the week and we don’t seem to hear them as much because we’re getting ready for the day. But, unless you’ve got hyper-active 7 year olds, Saturday mornings are a time of rest. And these dogs seem to take great delight in reminding us that our weekend has started — very early.   

Making matters worse, they are great escape artists. They roam around a fenced-in back yard but like Steve McQueen in a POW camp, they have a knack for getting out and taking a walk around our neighborhood. On several occasions, I’ve actually tracked them down when I saw them out for an unleashed stroll and brought them back to their pen. Yes, I’ve had thoughts about letting them wander further away, but why take it out on the dogs themselves?    

I’ve talked to the two adults who live at the house and I might as well be talking to my own dog. No, that’s insulting to my dog. And I’ve talked to the police, who are in charge of animal control. But I feel guilty asking them to spend time sitting outside a house waiting for a dog to bark when they could be spending their time on more important things, like sitting on Old Mill Road trapping scofflaws who are going 35 miles per hour. And, when they do show up, it doesn’t matter because it’s like when your car is making a clanking sound and you make an appointment at Billy Joe’s Auto Repair Shop (the one right next to Bob’s Auto Parts Emporium). As you know, the minute you drive up the clanking stops. 

So, instead, I must now resort to my award-winning column to get things off my chest and make a statement. 

Wake up folks. How the heck can you be sitting in your house and not hear your yapping dogs? Or, is it possible that you do hear them and you just don’t care?   I mean, I’m watching my dog right now, sitting in our unfenced back yard and if she started barking for too long, I would go outside and chastise her.  And, if in the incredibly unlikely event that she kept barking, I would walk her back into the house. 

The point is that we all live in some form of neighborhood which coincidentally is populated with “neighbors.”  And we all have a right to the enjoyment of our home. 

Shut those dogs up — or next time I just might let them continue walking up the street. 

Nozzy Neb February 28, 2012 at 05:12 PM
These dog owners are similar to the people in restaurants with their children running around out of control. They either don't care or are so used to hearing it, they don't hear it anymore. I used to call the dog across the street "The Chinese Water Torture". She was a little dog and would be let out at 5am every day to do her business. When she was done and wanted to come back inside she'd make one bark. Wait a few seconds, and then bark, rinse, repeat. I'd lie there saying please let her in! And then silence.... ahhh.... "bark" AAAAAAAH! I finally bought a white noise generator and I don't hear her or the one next door that barks at E V E R Y T H I N G. You might want to try that so you can at least sleep in on weekends. Dave, loved your comment!
Lorraine D. Maguire February 28, 2012 at 10:07 PM
Have you tried calling them whenever the dog starts barking on Sat/Sun morning?? If you are disturbed...they should be too!! Say..."I just wanted you to know that your dog mlust need to come in..." Get a prepaid phone...and they will never know it's you...LOL or like I told you before the man here in Charleston marched down to the house at 2AM in his undees with his shot gun...banged on the door and then got a good night sleep!! In county "lock-up!!" NO barking dogs there!! LOL
Heather February 29, 2012 at 06:08 AM
Wow, Ron, I didn't know we were next door neighbors--I must live on the other side of these dogs. Just teasing. Actually I live next to a rather large dog that is allowed outside and left out there for HOURS at a time and it barks constantly. Even at night when it's pitch black outside and I can't imagine what it sees or hears to bark at! Then just to the other side of that house is another with a baying type hound that goes on and on and on. The part that REALLY frosts me is that I can't even drive into my own driveway and walk into my house without chaos going on from these two dogs when they are both out. It's horrible. One night I totally lost it and went out onto my patio and screamed at the one next door. It just barked more of course but I was hoping the owners would get the hint. Silly me, they didn't. I actually considered buying one of those electric collars that shock the dogs when they bark and leaving it on each of their stoops all wrapped up with the dogs' names on them at Christmastime but I chickened out. Sigh. Thanks for the vent.
BoSox26 February 29, 2012 at 08:52 PM
The problem is that hat of yours. Obviously, those dogs are Red Sox fans just out to annoy you.
AJ March 02, 2012 at 04:37 PM
Across the street the dog is out all hours (am I YOUR neighbor Heather?) and that was just terrific when my mother came home ill from Iraq and was trying to heal. My dad went over to talk to them and when asked "well what kind of pet do YOU have" he responded "goldfish". The barking continues.


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